Sometimes the most beautiful moments in life are drawn from periods of great pain. Such as the eight year old daughter who embraces the soldier whom she knows as father after he has been away or the cancer patient whom with their final stretch of strength hears they are free. Our hearts are only as strong as our Maker allows them to be and sometimes all though it feels like the clouds cover the path of our prayers to our Father, He listens and in His wisdom sometimes He remains silent. These times are the most difficult because as tears stream down our face and frustration consumes us it is hard to not have immediate answers. However, I believe that when God is silent and our troubles rise against our patience, the joy of the outcome is that much greater. So as we push through one impossible day after the other, it is not that our prayers are in vain but rather our Father is working towards something far greater, something perfect for us. “Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us." (Romans 5:1-5). So despite our own lack of understanding, God creates splendour from suffering. In the face of our trials, although the temptation to lose hope is great, it is far better to press on because I know with full faith that His conclusion is perfect

Since I have got home my life has been a whirlwind of catching up with old friends, applying for job after job and lots of driving! There is one thing however that has plagued me since the very moment I arrived in Canada; the cold. The first steps off the plane were met by a brisk wind that blanketed my sun saturated skin and filled my tropically accustomed lungs (Don't worry, I already hear the chorus of people saying "we don't feel sorry for you"). This new and all too easily forgotten feeling of winter was not such an easy thing to adjust to. In fact, I have now found myself stealing housecoats at Costco so that I can wear them around the freezing cold store, situating myself on the edge of the Olive Garden fireplace while I eat my dinner as to simply be comfortable and avoiding eating frozen food so I won’t have to venture to the freezer aisles of Safeway. While to others I may appear slightly insane or dramatic, to myself, I am simply trying to survive in this bitter cold.

Till I See You Again

We all came from vastly different worlds and now, after four months, we watch one another past through the gate of Portantorchas, some for the very last time, and drive down the hill that we often complained about having to climb, wondering if we may never see that person that we have come to love as a brother or sister again in this lifetime. Then, we make our way back into the Salla where we stumbled into every morning, eyes half-shut, PJ’s still on and warm from bed, hair messy and unwashed but hey, it didn’t matter because we were like siblings. I think it is going to be the strangest, perhaps most empty feeling to leave the safety of the Port bubble and wake up in a room that is all my own; not sitting down and eating breakfast with my friends every morning, not playing hours of ping-pong because I guess I will have “better things” to do, not speaking Spanish because no one will know what I am saying and not eating copious amounts of McDonalds. Yes, I will be the first to admit I have complained before about how I “miss home” and how excited I will be to go home with all its comforts. However, there may just be a small part of me that wakes up that first morning, in my own bed, uninterrupted by several alarm clocks and blow-dryers, not having to wait for the bathroom (or finding another one all together because someone neglected to pay heed to the angry sign on the door)... and I will think...man, I really miss that place.

Yes, we all came from immeasurably different worlds, and even though we know each other very well, we do not know what it going to be like for our fellow friends to dive back into the lives they used to call normal, whatever that may be. Therefore, to all of you, I promise you that I will always keep you in my prayers and I love you and will miss you all very much!

As time goes by...

I cannot believe how fast the time has gone. It feels like just yesterday that I arrived at this little bubble of a world down here in Costa Rica so uncertain of what it was going to be like, if I would be able to make any friends and if I could ever possibly learn Spanish. After four months I have learned more than I could have ever bargained for and I have memories that I will not soon forget. I am very excited to go home (11 days!!!). I imagine it is going to be a bit weird at first. Not having to translate things in my head, just being able to get in my car and drive and most of all, not seeing the same lovely thirty faces every day, all day. I will miss you guys more than you could possibly know...
(Note: Tash, if you are creepin this, which you most likely are 1. Please don't kill me and 2. Please do not tell Poka about this photo)

Can someone explain to me how one can wake up feeling like "P-Diddy"?

A few weekends ago we took the amazing trek to the volcano Arenal. The drive was long but in comparison to my other trips it was quite the winner. We spent the day by the pool and at the several different hot springs at the “Springs Resort”. It was utterly captivating.

At night me and some of my favourite people slept on the deck, beneath the stars, overlooking a lake and watching the volcano erupt into the night sky (from a safe distance). All in all, I was completely amazed about how fortunate I was to be there. I not only had a much needed tranquil weekend but I was yet again reminded that our God is incredible in the way that he has shaped our surroundings. A lot of times I find myself impatiently stretching my thoughts through time, past and future, and I forget to be present and delight in the moment that I am experiencing. However, on the drive home through the lush Costariccan terrain that I have come to love so much, I can honestly say that I was content. Although I still miss home, my family, friends and familiar surroundings, I cannot say that I would have liked to be anywhere other than right here in Costa Rica at that moment.

I was simply blow drying my hair when suddenly...


"Put the blow drier down quickly", my friend said with a hint of panic in her voice yet still keeping it together quite well. My first thought was that the blow-dryer had caught on fire because this has happened to me more than once so I put it down and then she instructed me to carefully step away from the counter. In the corner was this...

... huddled in the corner, this posionous spider was curiously cuddling about 2 cm from my exposed feet.

Let's just say that my heart-rate has never increased at such a rapid pace before...

3 x 5

Pictures make me so incredibly happy. My old room was filled with photos on the door, walls and in frames. I love having them as tiny reminders of times in my life that joy was captured in time to prevail on paper. Moments become immortal, faces of loved ones become retainable, memories become tangible. With pictures, a collection of happenings that touched my heart can be embraced in one single stack of prints. A picture has the power to imprison a great deal more than 1000 words it can be a canvas for...

intrigue...

Regrettable decisions


Emotion... whatever that may be



Inspiration

Transformation

Discomfort

Adventure

Love

And so my dear friends,
Although you may be a million miles away, an ocean apart and a language in between your lovely faces and cherished times are right here with me, our frozen memories clothe my Costariccan walls... and you are all dearly loved and missed!

Trouble...

I would like to share with you one of the many beautiful aspects of living in Costa Rica... an abundance of ants!

Let me tell you... these guys are good! They haunt the halls of my school, they congregate on my floor, walls and shower and they busily bustle through my unsealed food and my clothing. I absolutely love these little black, creepy crawlers whom insist on sharing my living space no matter how much bleach or ‘tronex’ I use to try and clean them away. Blessed minuscule bugs, little do they know I have requested an extra effective ant trap that is making its way over in the mail. I will thoroughly enjoy watching them, one after the other, march into the ant trap from where they will never return. Now, before you frown at my morbid excitement please note the hurt I feel when these tiny troublemakers invade my tiny, sealed, 9 dollar jar of peanut butter (I have no idea how) or chose to nibble on me instead for scarcity of food... I am certain you would feel the same way.
Dearest ants,
For now you guys reign but take warning... your time is quickly dwindling.

Grace Like Rain

I know that some people might be wondering “where in the world is Christie?” ... and so for my lack of attention to the blogging world I am sorry.

Dear child you are forgiven and loved.

These words resound within my heart in an especially noteworthy way lately. I cannot sum up what I have learned here so far with simple sections and themes or theological facts and controversial issues. However, there have been moments where it as if God is leaving me profound sticky notes, I am given ideas or concepts that “stick”. One of these notions (one that happens to build the brace of Christianity) has just recently made sense to me. I am lost for an explanation as to why.
The entire gospel is overflowing with it, we are commanded to give it, it is presented without atonement but it is by no means easy to give for there IS a price that has been paid by Christ, it is grace. I guess I have struggled with this part of being a Christian. In no way am I one to abundantly offer grace yet at the same time I am particularly hesitant to receive it. My entire life I have seen God as someone carrying a cookie jar of my ever-multiplying sins and I somehow have disregarded grace. Perhaps this is because I have difficulty finding it in life today. The world is starving for grace and I have seen it in the eyes of the people such as those of the Vancouver Downtown Eastside where for most people that live there all rumours of grace simply seem like “nice thoughts” not actual practices. As Philip Yancy puts it, “Grace, like many Christian words, has been leached of its meaning and so that I can no longer trust it”. Therefore, my problem does not only lie in that I cannot always give grace as God commands me to but I also cannot locate a tangible source from which it flows without ceasing except... Christ. Believe me when I say that I know that grace is such a fundamental thing, something that should have been understood from the “get go”. It is not that I did not understand but I guess I lacked the faith to believe. Honestly, I would think that for most, the church is not the first thought that comes to mind when searching for grace. It is disappointing and discouraging because sometimes I feel like church can be a place which presents a partial gospel, lacking the maturity to live out what it claims to believe. However, I want to be different. I want to and I am determined for God to transform my heart and so I am able to finally say “You are forgiven and dearly loved without condition and forevermore” because I now finally believe and live like my almighty Father thinks this of me; completely unlovable and undeserving yet fully forgiven.

Now that I have had the pleasure of spending one week here in Costa Rica I am convinced of this: it is beautiful! I constantly find myself enchanted by my surroundings, captivated by their ever-evolving splendour. It is a refreshing reminder of God’s glory, a minor glimpse of heaven seeping through what is known to be a greatly impoverished country. Interestingly enough, there is nothing glamorous about Costa Rica in the slightest. When one has lived life equating beauty with perfection this place does not reach anywhere near the normal standards. However, it holds its own standard altogether. Upon taking a very interesting route home from the beach this afternoon we drove through miles and miles of lush, green, mountainous terrain, floating above clouds and land while encompassed by God’s untouched creation. Flowers grew without restraint, rivers ran without disturbance and wild butterflies glided gracefully, weaving through the quiet bustle of the rainforest. Lacking the towering skyscrapers of Vancouver and the forged lighting of the city, it was an incredible introduction to something that was beautiful untouched.
One of the smaller goals of my list of things “to do in life” was to re-work my idea of beauty. This was partly because I somehow felt I did not fully understand or perhaps I did not (maybe still do not) know what beauty truly is. I feel that somehow I have been shown a poisoned image of beauty to live up to, one which is almost impossible to obtain by its own standards. Therefore, it is both refreshing and captivating to be blessed with such a beautiful location to live in. That is all!

The Mad Dash

I should actually be doing the insane amounts of homework that I have during this minor moment of free time but I have decided that after 4 straight hours of Spanish class... a day... that it would be much more productive to blog!
The Costa Rica style of driving is one that both is thrilling and life-threatening; thrilling if you are in a car and life-threatening if you are anywhere else (apart from the safety of your own home... yet even still). My first moments in Costa Rica included a very fast-paced education on the rules of the road. Firstly, a small community closed down a section of the highway in order for the children to play on it, leaving everyone to reroute and causing great amounts of traffic. It struck me as so strange that that would be allowed and even odder, that it is common. Secondly, by law, the pedestrians do not have the right of way here. Now, for those of you who know my common theory (that I am certain others share), I believe that cars will stop while crossing the road. Perhaps, not even out of courtesy but at the very least a common respect to not kill pedestrians. However, this is not so. Friendly walking icons that illuminate and chirp to signal a safe time to walk, thick white lined cross-walks providing a protected walkway of peace and bright-vested road crossing governers have all yet to make it to the lovely place of Costa Rica. Much like playing “frogger”, one must dart across the road when an opening appears, trying not to hit the cars or... let the cars hit onesself. You may imagine this as a fun sort of activity filled with laughter and good times with fellow foreigners but it actually very much resembles trying to avoid the possibility of death. Just imagine trying to cross four lanes of cars that disregard the thought to stop upon seeing a person in their path.

New Beginnings

I finally arrived! After months and months of planning and anticipation I made it. Costa Rica is not quite what I had expected it to be. The campus is a lot bigger than I had thought and the overall atmosphere is different than expected. I had this image in my mind of what it would be like, how it would be difficult to adjust to the lifestyle. However, I cannot exactly describe it, but there is a overwhelming sense of peace that cascades over this place. Upon arrival I was not nervous or intimidated but actually felt very at home here. The people are really great so far and although my language skills are not so great yet, communication between the two cultures appears to be going okay. The water tastes weird here, not bad, it just has a flavor to it. So far i have not encountered any out-of-the-ordinary wildlife but I am sure it will happen soon. I have been told that there are taratulas here (big brothers of my greatly feared friends, spiders) and so my first encounter with one of them will be more than interesting... i will keep you posted.

One more day...

As I sit in my room, walls stripped of the once life-giving photos and memories, i cannot help but admit that i am sad to leave. Even the simple act of packing up my few treasured belongings and clothes triggered a feeling of uncertainty in me. Not to say that I am uncertain about what I am doing next year because that is the one event that i know is God santified and perhaps even a miracle at this particular time in my life. I just never pictured my departure occuring this way. Whereas a few months ago i was eagerly counting down the days in anticipation, I have now realized that when I finally do come home I will be changed which is scary for me. I also will be searching for a place to live which adds to the feeling of uncertainty i have about leaving without any substantial home to come back to. The once small town comfort of being able to go to the grocery store and see ten people you know will be removed and alone i will conquer the foreign land of Costa Rica and discover life in what people call “the real world”. Regardless of all this i am excited for how my heart and views will grow and change. I will do my best to keep up regular posts so that everyone may know how it is going.

All At Sea

This past Monday night Jordan and I found ourselves in a state of overwhelming boredom. As we brainstormed what we could possibly do in a town that shuts down around 7:30pm on average we were struck with the brilliant idea, "Let's find a boat!". After a lucky phone call in which my brother hesitantly agreed to lend us his two person, blow-up "Explorer", we were off on the adventure of a lifetime. In an effort to try and transport the floatation device, we anchored it on the roof of my tiny red car with two cables coming through the passenger and driver's windows. It was a less than admirable/llegal means of carrying the lightweighted "Explorer" which my brother clearly voiced with his stare of concern/ disbelief as we drove away. Not to fear Bran-muffin (or in other words, my brother), 30km/hr did us and the "Explorer" just fine. We carried our new vessel all the way down the Fred Gingell stairs eager to start our voyage at sea. Though the water was slightly choppy, we launched with ease and began to aimlessly paddle around the ocean as the sun set on horizon. As we noted the reality that one simple prick and the "Explorer" would deflate like a bouncy castle struck by an over-eager donut eater, we became aware that our inflatable of fun was less reliable than we had previously daydreamed about. Fortunatly the little orange ocean conquerer pulled through and we remained dry. It was no "Pirates of the Caribbean" type of adventure but it was still a very welcomed alternative to the regular movie watching Tsawwassen nights.

coming to you live from my new laptop!

hello all,
I just got a new laptop and seeing as I am overflowing with excitement i thought that i would share this with everyone who reads this blog!

Update: Caribbean departure in 18 days!

All Over Now

Yesterday was grad and it was most definetly a bittersweet event. It was a day to remember. From the endless bombardment of photographers/ parents wanting to document every moment of the day on film, to the final hours spent dancing the night away with people I may never see again, the overall day was fantastic! To be honest I really did not think that I would enjoy grad as much as everyone appeared to in past years. The hours spent getting ready, picture after picture, dinner and then goodbyes did not seem like a night that would be fun to participate in. However, after sitting all morning while my friend Adrianna pinned my hair to perfection (making me truly “feel” the authenticity of the saying “beauty is pain”) and trying three times to attach false eyelashes, the moment I actually arrived at the grad I realized that this was a day I would never forget. The dry grad was also amazing. I had heard from years past that it was an event that kept your attention for about 2 hours and then you spent the night counting down the minutes till you could leave but it was actually incredibly fun. The rec centre was transformed with beach themed décor, a gambling section, mini-golf, a dance floor, volleyball and much more. I am still so amazed at how my body allowed me to be awake till 6am that morning without taking a moment of rest or sleep. That day I slept from 6am till 4:30pm, needless to say I was very tired.
It is so strange to me that it is actually all over now. There were days this year when I was literally counting the minutes till high school would be finished with but now I am left with a sort of empty feeling of “now what?”. Don’t get me wrong, of course I know what lies ahead and I am very certain that it is what God wants for my future (for now anyways), but it is sad to know that for the first time ever, we (the grads of 2009) are all left to go our separate ways and eventually find our place in the real world. I am both sadden and excited because nothing could be more refreshing than leaving the comforting “bubble” of Tsawwassen life, but I can’t help but think that once I leave this tiny sunshine-loving town it will be sad to leave its familiarity behind. I will always think of this place as home with its many memories and me being a very sentimental person, I will hardly forget the place that Tsawwassen and the people in it have in my heart.

Viva la Vida!

This past Sunday i attended the Coldplay concert. I would like to inform all of you that it was amazing! To make it even better one of my favorite bands ever, Snow Patrol, opened for Coldplay. The sweet Irish accent of Snow Patrol's lead singer Gary Lightbody plus the unforgettable antics of Coldplay made for a remarkably enjoyable evening.

Here are some pictures ... im sorry they are so bad.

We are very excited

Snow Patrol

My pitiful attempt to zoom in on Coldplay

It always brings me to the brink of tears, "Fix You" by Coldplay

Hola mis amigos!

Well folks, it is less than two months till my departure and I am feeling both excited and extremely nervous. Trekking off to the land of tarantulas, scorpions, crocodiles, monkeys, bountiful rain, beautiful surf, possible tornados and volcanic eruptions (just to name a few things), will be an adventure to say the least! It is incredible just how fast the time is passing. I have spent ample time looking up Costa Rica tourism videos on youtube revealing some very interesting Costa Rican creatures that I will be sharing a home with next year. I guess it is just all apart of the experience. I have also neglected to spend any time learning the language (Spanish) of which I will take classes in next year (oops!). The week before I leave I will be touring the Caribbean leaving from Miami and visiting Haiti, Jamaica, Grand Cayman and Mexico for 10 days which should be AMAZING! There is just something about the surf and sand that just gives me such joy.
In other news, my UBC deferral request has gone through and the final plans of attending the school in the fall of 2010 are underway. I am not so excited about this in comparison to my current adventures but it will be so great to be back home, seeing all the people I love after being away for so long. 57 days and counting!
Adios!

These are some photos that my aunt took on her trip to Costa Rica. These guys look pretty friendly if you ask me!

From me to you!

Dear Friends,

I do not exactly have anything pressing to blog about but I decided that perhaps it would be therapeutic for me to just write about everyday happenings. So today was Monday… nothing too special occurred. I went to school which was draining, had a serious conversation with someone about why people do not appreciate stalkers and then picked up the children from school (not my children, the ones I babysit daily). The youngest of the three boys decided to spend our entire trip home re-wording Christmas carols to lyrics which always involved my death or serious injury. I then proceeded to aid my infected ear which has become really painful. It all began on a rainy March morning when Tash, Brighid and I woke up without our brains and decided to bus downtown to a demonic piercing shop to get our tragus’ pierced. Do not get me wrong, although it might have been a rather rebellious decision, it grew on me and I like now. All was swell for the first few weeks but the last two days a tiny growth resembling a pimple began to make its home around the entrance wound. I am sorry this is so descriptive and gross. I am almost certain no one wants to know about this but I feel like it is less shocking if you read about it here and then see it versus it just popping up in your line of view.
Tootles!

What's been going on...

So I haven’t really blogged in a while but it is the end of a less-than-great weekend and with nothing better to do I decided to write this post announcing that I leave for Costa Rica in 90 DAYS! That is 3 months people (I say people assuming that more than one person reads this… if not, no loss). When I really think about it 90 days is not that long of a time. I feel like there is so much I have to and want to do before I leave. There’s grad of course, but there is also so much more I want to do and so many people that I want to spend as much time as possible with before I go. I am so excited and I believe that it will be really good for me to be going away. I have been looking at my fellow classmates and they are all from different parts of the world which will be so cool. I don’t know if there will be much to miss about rainy Vancouver once I am living on those sandy Costa Rican shores.

25 random things you might or might not want to know…

1. I love ironing and if it was an admirable and high paying career I would be a professional ironer.
2. I dislike cherries from an unfortunate childhood incident… yet my favorite flavor of anything is cherry.
3. I prefer classical music over any others… lame, I know.
4. The only movie that I have ever cried in was The Notebook … even lamer.
5. I love turbulence… not lame, awesome.
6. I am afraid of aliens and once called Jen late at night in order for her to convince me of their non-existence.
7. I know someone named Dort. I believe this to be the strangest name on earth… sorry if you’re reading this, it’s true.
8. I am OCD about things being clean.
9. I once had a candle lit in my room during the middle of the night… Who did it? Not too sure, but I do have my suspicions.
10. I once turned the color of the Statue of Liberty upon getting my ear pierced.
11. I used to collect sand dollars in order to dry them up, break them in half and see the little doves fall out.
12. In February I ate banana pancakes for the first time and finally understood why Jack Johnson felt so passionate about them to write a song.
13. I love thrift stores.
14. I used to try and convince my siblings that I knew people on other planets and I could fly us there on our magic blanket… more than lame… downright embarrassing.
15. I used to have a gigantic mural of Mount Baker covering one of my bedroom walls.
16. I get extreme joy out of playing “Would you rather”... hehe
17. My sister and I used to play soccer with our hamster in his exercise ball… which might explain why he chewed through metal bars and three layers of drywall to escape us.
18. I love sailing and watching the stars from out at sea!
19. I am extremely concerned about what other people think… I desperately wish I wasn’t.
20. I really enjoy time alone.

21. Everyday I think of a song that relates to my day and write it down in my journal to remember.
22. In kindergarten my “crush” (if you can really call it that) and I made a plan to run away together... still not sure where we were planning on going.
23. I desperately wish I was REALLY talented at something… who knows, perhaps my talent is still out there.
24. I really love pictures because they are the best reminders of joyous times in my life.
25. I am extremely afraid of going away after high school is over.

The very first...

Yes, i have also joined the blogging world. I have held off thus far because i do not believe that i have anything that interesting to say. However, considering that i am most likely jetting away to Costa Rica in approx. 123 days, I thought that maybe i could use this blog to let people know whats going on while i'm away!
Hopefully there will be some semi-interesting posts in the future... i will try my best.